Father’s Day Road Rage

Last Sunday evening, while driving home with two of my children from a special Improv Olympics Father’s Day show, I learned an important lesson.

Be careful while driving south bound on Sheffield, near Wrigley Field, especially if driving within two hours of a weekend Cubs Yankees game. 

My mistake: While in the left hand lane, I abruptly changed lanes to the right in order to pass the vehicle in front of me preparing to turn left. Before turning I diligently check in my rear view mirror to be sure that no motorist was behind me.

Regretfully, I didn’t check for bicyclists.  My kids noticed.

“Uh, Dad” said my youngest, an 18 year old daughter who, despite her lovely non confrontational demeanor, frequently criticizes me for not routinely activating my turn signal when changing lanes. “You cut off that biker.”

“Yeah Dad,” chimed in my 21 year old son, a young man who only five years earlier I had patiently taught the intricacies of parallel parking and to whom I offered countless driving tips. “You almost hit him.”

As I proceeded south on Sheffield, near Belmont, my repeated glances into my rear view mirror unveiled the image of a young male biker, peddling hard in the middle of my lane, trying to catch me. As he passed me on my right side, I could hear him shout out some unintelligible words, directed towards me.

Being the type of person who always presumes the best of others, I chose to interpret what he said as something considerate. “I think he said ‘massive hole?’ The nice young man must be warning me about a giant pothole next block.”

My son (who is more of a realist) didn’t hear it that way. Within seconds, he rolled down his passenger side window, and offered his response: “Hey dude. Next time wear a helmet. Be safe!”

The bicyclist slowed down, and as I approached him, with him on my driver’s side, he repeated what he said earlier, causing me to realize that though I accurately heard him shout the word “hole,” he uttered only a select portion of the word “massive” immediately beforehand.

I would like to say that at this point, my years of wisdom and my desire to set a proper example for my children kicked in - that, realizing that nothing good could come about from verbally retaliating, I continued driving, ignoring him.

Of course, I didn’t. Picking up on my son’s observation, I rolled down my window and shouted out choice expletives, including something about the fact that he should wear an ‘F-ing helmet,’ which resulted in him responding in kind, and threatening to permanently alter the appearance of my side view mirror.

My kids stopped me before I could respond further. Following their advice, I activated my right turn blinker and turned at the next side street, retreating from harm’s way, my side view mirror in tact, but not my ego.

My children looked at me with dismay.  Both lectured me about my carelessness at changing lanes without first looking for bicyclists, and they also offered their opinion on how ridiculous I sounded mouthing off to the guy.

At first I got defensive, arguing that most drivers like me simply are not accustomed to sharing our city’s streets with so many bicyclists (seemingly more than ever before), and that we often forget about being mindful of bikes, especially when a street does not have designated bike lanes.

Yet, I also realized that “wrong is wrong” and I was wrong. It doesn’t matter how reckless or drunk or ill prepared some bicyclists might be, those of us driving motor vehicles must constantly be on the look out for bicyclists at all times, irrespective of whether the bicyclist is responsible or reckless.

We drivers cannot presume that all bicyclists are responsible. There are those who don’t wear helmets, and if we hit them (or worse, carelessly open our doors as they are passing us), we bear the liability if they experience head injuries, which many do. Whether we like it or not, we must realize that some bikers choose to ride at night without adequate reflective gear, or lights. Many don’t believe in stopping at stop signs or stop lights and many feel comfortable riding on all parts of the road. We might get angry at them, but we have to realize that they are there and we must exert full caution.

No one wants to deal with the ugly reality if a biker - even a reckless one - gets hit by us, even if their injury is aggravated by their stupidity, such as failure to wear a helmet. As drivers we simply have to avoid having accidents with them. Life will be easier that way.

Similarly, those of us who are bikers need to consider that not all drivers all fully cognizant of their responsibility to share the road. Some drivers, like me in this instance, may fail to take adequate precautions. Bikers cannot ignore the danger of riding bikes in an urban area. We must wear helmets. If riding at night, we must wear reflective gear or place reflective apparatus on the rear of our bikes. We ought to install lights.

What about drinking and biking?

In the past thirty years there has been a heightened awareness of the perils of drinking and driving motor vehicles.

Bikers must fully consider the danger of drinking and riding bikes.
The rules are common sense. Stay off of your bike if you are over served. Leave your bike at the bar. Take a taxi home.

Or do the humiliating thing and simply stumble home.

It sure beats having to fend with the likes of me on the road.

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